And let me tell you, as an aside, that no matter how big or small your cock is, it feels big in her ass!
But before you can get there, you may have to go through a bit of trouble. Is it worth it? Yes. Can I help guide you through the waters? Yes. Hey buddy, that's what I'm here for!
Now, I've read all the Penthouse and Literotica stories about all the women who just love anal sex, even the first time. They beg for it. They live for it. They want the whole neighborhood in their ass, or at least the entire produce department. Tell me, where do they live and what are their phone numbers? In my experience, women are afraid of anal sex, at least initially. Afraid of the pain, afraid of the dirty stigma the taboo. And if your wife is dead set against anal sex, "that's an exit, not an entrance!" then you probably feel that all is lost. You'll never experience it with her. Wrong!
I can tell you that my wife felt the same way for the identical reasons and we overcame it. It took some time. But here's the thing – it could have been a lot quicker had I known what I am going to pass on to you!
We did it all wrong at first – dove right into it. No lubrication, no arousal, no deal. It hurt her like hell and we didn't try it again for years. What a waste. I won't let you fall into this trap.
I should tell you though, if she is unequivocally against it for, perhaps, moral or religious reasons. If she has painful hemorrhoids or another medical condition – they you may possibly – not definitely – have insurmountable obstacles. But if the hang up is that she once tried it with you or an old boyfriend and has 'painful' memories of the experience, this can be overcome with some knowledge and technique.
I'm sure you've read lots of material on anal sex if you have an interest in it, like me. So I won't go over the same worn out information except for just a few biggies:
1. Do not move your cock from her anus to her vagina, you can cause a bacterial infection and may never enjoy anal sex with her again. You can, of course, go from vagina to anus – just not the other way around.
2. Do not start out pounding her like a raw piece of meat. You may hurt her or rip something inside. Just start off with the head of your cock inside her beautiful asshole and let her sphincter muscles adapt to it. Easy as she goes.
3. There's no lubrication down there – it's not the vagina – you've got to bring your own. I've heard and read lots of stories where guys will use their spit or pussy juice to lubricate their cocks for rear entry – hell I've written some. How manly. But unless you both work in an oil factory, they don't work well. I highly recommend Astroglide, which you can buy next to the condoms and the drug store. It's slippery as an eel, and will let you slide right in. Plus, it doesn't smell, won't melt a condom and washes right off. Any good quality water soluble lubricant is fine.
OK, that takes care of housekeeping. Now the good stuff. First, the big question – what's so great about anal sex? Women have one nice, soft, wet hole – shouldn't that be enough? Why go through all the aggravation. Isn't one hole as good as another?
Well, yes and no. Sure the first hole is plenty good! I've had some of my best times down there. Women usually cum easier from vaginal sex. It's got its own lubrication source. It's in a convenient location, etc.
But suppose you've been there and done that a thousand times already. Suppose you're ready to spice things up a bit. Walk on the wild side a little. Experience something sort of nasty for a change. Have the opportunity to say things like "Who's the boss? – Who's your daddy?" without being in prison. Then anal sex may be for you!
When I first broached the subject with my wife, she declined. I think her exact words were, "Don't ever touch me down there or I'll fart all over you." Arousing. So I let it go for a little while – say ten years. But then, as I said, time went by and even she got a little bored with the routine. Plus, when it comes time for her period, there's a week off from sex that I don't need.
I read a lot about anal sex to her, but it always seemed like 'Advice from your doctor about anal sex.' It wasn't helping, or stirring her to action. Then I read about a book called Tristan Taormino's ultimate guide to anal sex for women. Tristan is a women who's an expert in the field. The aim of the book is to educate and initiate pleasurable anal sex.
Better still, I read that it was available on videotape. Read the review if you like. They'll even tell you where to by it online. I bought the videotape. It's a big one, two parts. We watched it together. It was a little slow at times, not your typical adult video. But it did show people talking rationally about and enjoying anal sex.
I'll never forget my wife's reaction after watching the tape. She said, "maybe it hurts good." I was in – but not yet. Just because she'll give it a try doesn't mean you should go about it in the same plodding way you did the first time. You'll make the same mistakes and wind up back at square one.
So here they are – the do's and don'ts – the ins and outs. These tips will work!
1. Set aside a date and time when you'll have some real time alone. Not at 11:00pm on Thursday. Best option, go away for the weekend. You'll never have a second chance to do it right the first time. And that first time is the key. A good experience will bring you others. A bad one...
2. Start off with a cocktail, if you drink. No, I'm not suggesting you get her drunk and sloppy, that won't work (well it might!). I'm recommending that you do something to take the edge off, to lighten things up and feel good. A drink or two can really help.
3. Start off with lots of foreplay and get her hot and bothered first. Kiss her neck, squeeze, bite and lick her nipples, go down on her – but not enough to make her cum – yet. Very best bet – go buy yourself a vibrator if you don't own one already (what??) Play with her clit with the vibrator. Then stick it into her pussy.
4. Now, lube up. Spread the lube liberally on your cock and around her asshole. Just around it is fine, you don't have to stick your finger in it. In fact, women I know who love anal sex hate having fingers stuck up their butt – big turn off to them. So unless she doesn't mind or wants to, don't do it.
5. You're lubed up, she's worked up. Now a word about position. On her side works well. Or on her back with her legs way up. If you're doll is on all fours, you may have to squat over her to get your meat in right. Again, easier is better at first. When you have more experience, there are a lot of good positions to try. Like reverse anal gowgirl (RAC), where she sits on your lap on a chair or the bed with you balls-deep in her ass.
6. Now stick just the head of your cock in her anus. It may be a little tight at first (God bless her) so don't force it and make sure you've got plenty of lube on –reapply if you have to and as often as you want to. Once the head is in there, hang out. Let her get used to the feeling of it in her ass.
7. Then slowly, inch by inch, bury that fucker in there. Make sure she's still getting plenty of clitoral stimulation. My wife was too busy concentrating on how good the vibrator felt on her clit to worry about me violating her ass. When she was getting ready to cum from the vibrator, my cock in her ass felt plenty good - she told me. It enhanced her orgasm tremendously.
8. After you've hit the jackpot, and stop smiling after a week, don't go back to the well too quick. Wait a few weeks, a month, before you try it again. Anal sex is not an every time event for most women anyway.
At this point my wife asks me to fuck her in the ass. Hell, she plays with my ass and it feels great! Plus, she likes it a lot when I rub her clit and lick around her asshole, sticking my tongue in just a bit. It makes her cum – hard. She never would have even thought about this before we had anal sex.
Lastly, and I hope no women take this the wrong way. A good women likes to please her man, just as, hopefully a good man takes care of his gal. If she can do something to excite and please him, that doesn't involve pain or injury, she might be more receptive than you think. It may just be a matter of some thought readjustment, jettisoning of old, useless beliefs about right or wrong.
Wrong, in my opinion, is something that causes another person physical pain or injury. Asking them to take too big a risk. Right is rejecting old beliefs out of hand, forgetting what other people might think – though who are they to tell you what to do in your sex life? – and doing something new that picks up the pace and gets the juices flowing again.